Thursday, September 30, 2010

Road Map

I know. I know. I haven't posted lately. Bear with me, I do have an excuse or two.

My grandmother passed away on September 18. I was supposed to be working at the simulcast our church was hosting that day, but my plans were obviously abruptly changed. I look back and think about that day. I had been focused on that day for 6 months. I literally would just get tears in my eyes thinking about my excitement for September 18 when I was going to get to unleash in praise and worship with Travis Cottrell. What I didn't realize all those days and months was that that day would have an eternal impact on me in a way I never imagined.

Sitting at my grandparents' house that day, family and friends were flooding in. I would stare for a while, talk for a while, cry for a while, repeat. I thought about how much I had looked forward to that day for the praise and worship. Then it hit me: my grandma is eternally praising and worshipping. While I had been counting down the days until my praise and worship high, I had inadverently been counting down the days for my grandmother's entrance into the pearly gates. It still hits me deep in the heart when I think about her walking the streets of gold adoring Christ.

Another amazing revelation from that weekend was God's orchestrating hands in every aspect of both life and death. I had not seen my cousin Shauna in probably 5 years. My sister had only stayed at my house one time in a year. And my entire family had not been together since I was a child. Ironically, before Grandma's passing, Shauna was in town from Washington, D.C. for the weekend. My sister and her family were staying the weekend with me. And my entire family had plans that Saturday night to meet for dinner. God chose that day to take Grandma, because God had already brought us together. It was not by mere chance that I had counted down to September 18. It was divinely planned.

I had the privilige to speak at her funeral two days after her passing. Although it was the hardest thing I had ever done, I hope it honored her life. I also hope that someone there was able to hear of my grandmother's love for Christ and that it touched them in the way only God can.

After Grandma's funeral, I went back to work the next day. At the time I felt that I needed to get back into the routine of life, but looking back I think maybe I should've taken some time. It all happened so fast. But I did what I thought was right at the time, so I have to be confident in that decision. Therefore, I went back to work that Tuesday.

It's been a wild couple weeks, but every last detail has been planned from the beginning of time...literally!! That's the neat thing about God. He knows. He knows what has happened, what's going to happen, and what will never happen. Although we can't guess how He plotted the road map, we can take the road He paved for us...or maybe gravelled for us...or blazed for us...regardless, He made it for us and it's time for us to take it!

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